@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
