No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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