Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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