My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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