its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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