I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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