So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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