with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
