But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
