That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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