so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
