Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
