So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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