I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
