I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Randomize
