i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
