last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
