i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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