No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
