can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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