based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
The uberlube is also flammable
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
