Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
