real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
