I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
