i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
