you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize