weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Randomize
