That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
