So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Buhtt sex?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
