she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
