shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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