We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
