Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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