Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
