what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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