Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
We smell like vodka and hangover
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