I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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