Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize
