EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
