you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
