i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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