He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize