Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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