i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
