I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
True college students do jello shots in the library
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