garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
