playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
