thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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