I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
