is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize