You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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